The Burrow

I was fine yesterday, except when I tried to raise my arm.  But sleep was elusive last night, and that is unusual for me.  Once my head hits the pillow, I rarely stir (beyond a bathroom visit).  Last night, though, I saw every hour as the digital clock marked the passage of time during which I was not asleep.   I kept falling back asleep, and waking up again.  I debated getting up and reading a boring book (Brother gifted me Nikolai Gogol short stories that are just deadly),  but moving seemed like more than I could handle.  I gave up in the 6's, and stumbled out to join TBG on the couch. I made had oatmeal and made phone calls and ran an errand or two and thought everything was just fine until it wasn't.   I barely made it home. I've spent the afternoon lying on the bed, reading Brian Broome's heartrending memoir of growing up black and gay.  I had planned to swim in the pool for the first time this season, but, again, moving seeme...

When I arrived at the empty Wallgreens, my mask was dangling from my wrist.  I made my way to the pharmacy in the far corner and put it right over my nose and mouth - there were masked people sitting in the chairs, waiting their turn while being socially distant.   There was no line at the window.  My paperwork (completed at home) was accepted without a problem.  I had to wait 15 minutes past my appointed time for the booster to end up in my arm, but everyone was pleasant and the chairs were comfortable. Everyone there was of a certain age.  We were filling up our vaccination cards like debutantes at a ball.  Personally, I would rather dance with a dashing young beau than be jabbed in the upper arm by a 50-something year old pharmacy tech. I wonder if there will be new cards when the next dose comes out.   As I waited the requested 15 minutes, others in our age cohort came over.  Everyone was masked.  Everyone stood a respectful dis...

That's what my doctor told me today, when I asked about getting the COVID booster.  She agreed that I was correct to be concerned, but she reminded me that most people aren't concerned, that we wouldn't be in this situation if people had vaccinated and masked way back then when being concerned might have made a difference, and that dynamic shows no signs of changing. So, since It's just going to be this way, and we want people to get out and live, you should protect yourself as best you can.   What she said made sense.  I changed my mind.  I decided to get the booster. The doctor's frustration that there is so much information floating around it's enough to confuse anyone and it's hard to know what to trust made me feel better about my uncertainty.  Do I trust Eric Topol, a high school friend of Brother who's now a scientific brain trust and frequently re-Tweeted expert , who has come around to accepting the 2nd booster?  Do I worry about the Israeli s...

They - whoever they  were - told me that two weeks would be enough.  The two weeks are up tomorrow. The Omicron variant was to have bulled its way through the population by now.  The vulnerable are supposed to have been infected and gotten sick and suffered the consequences by now.  There are medicines to treat the disease, and the triple vaxxed don't seem to be dying or overburdening the hospitals. Life was supposed to be back to normal tomorrow. I don't know what I was expecting - a flurry of confetti from the sky, a brass band marching down America's Main Street, millions of people streaming into the streets hugging and laughing and already beginning to forget the past two years. What I've got is nothing. I don't know where to go for answers.  The CDC is once more under attack, this time from the left - what used to be the dispositive choice is now just another bunch of hacks, or so they say.  Big Pharma is making vaccines for Omicron, even as it fades a...

TBG's doctor shook his hand  - Come on, we're both vaccinated  - at his routine visit today. I cancelled my private Pilates sessions for the next two weeks. Finding trustworthy information regarding exposure and isolation - especially at school or day care - is nigh on impossible. This does not make it easier to sleep at night.   I'm back to thanking delivery people and having groceries chosen by strangers and placed in my trunk by masked teenagers.   Two friends want to meet - that's not happening for a while. I have 9 library books on my counter.  A week ago I thought that was too many.  Now, with so many fewer options enticing me to leave my cocoon, I wonder if that is enough. Outdoor yoga tomorrow is a problem - how much space is enough space between mats?   How much risk am I willing to take?   Who can I turn to when assessing that risk? Are we back in the shadows again?  Who knows?

Neither does Giblet, but that's another story... or maybe the end of this one.  In any event, I digress.... if one can digress before one begins.   I've had a hard time sleeping these last few nights, which is unusual for me.  I've been over-heated, twisted in the covers, and kept awake once my eyes opened by the annoying dry cough caused by my blood pressure medicine.  I attributed my weariness to that.   But this morning, on my way to take JannyLou to a doctor's appointment (can you call it a doctor's appointment when you see a PA?), my head hurt.  I took some Advil and a Bayer, and nothing got worse... for a while.  By the time I got home, though, my throat was scratchy and my body felt crappy and I needed to lie down..... immediately. I was very glad that I was wearing a mask while we were in the office; I just knew I had COVID.  After all, I hosted a party for 35 strangers on Sunday night  - who knows what viruses were floating...

Confusing was the calmest adjective... or is it an adverb.... in the lead up to getting a supplemental COVID vaccine.  There was no guidance that was relevant fifteen minutes after it was issued. That's as much as I wrote before I fell asleep on the couch.  It was deep sleep, for a while, until I moved and my arm announced its presence with authority.   That was the beginning of my impetuous decision to get an additional dose of the Moderna vaccine.  A friend told me that Walgreens had lots of them, the online registration process was easy once I assembled my paperwork, and there was an appointment available at the pharmacy down the block in 15 minutes. An hour later I was jabbed and back on the couch.  I had to say that I was immunocompromised, but since my doctor told me to get the shot, and my immune system is old and therefore compromised, I only hesitated for a moment.  I don't like lying.  I don't like getting sick and dying even more. ...

Nicki Minaj has almost 23 million Twitter followers. She tweeted that her cousin's friend... or maybe her friend's cousin.... got the Covid vaccine and a swollen testicle - and the first gave rise to the second.  .  Despite all medical evidence to the contrary, Nicki Minaj tweeted the connection between manhood and the vaccine to 23 million followers, all over the globe.  This is not your aged aunt on her back porch sharing gossip with a neighbor.  23 million is a lot.   The media didn't help the situation by sharing the story - laughing at it but advancing it at the same time.  Then Joe Biden stepped in. He offered to educate her, to facilitate her meeting with scientists who would address her concerns, to get her questions answered, to do what he could to make her see the light. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be to inhabit Joe Biden's skin these days.  Have at it  was the most recent gentle explosion from within.  I'm having f...

Pandemica - I can't travel, I can't hug my friends, I can't eat. What?  I feel you furrowing your brows.  The connection is not obvious, but it's there. Taos Bubbe and I had plans to eat pizza and salad at Sauce ..... until she arrived early and discovered that they had no outdoor seating.  Luckily, the plaza also houses a  Prep and Pastry , which had several umbrella shaded tables just waiting for us....... after a 15 minute wait while they dithered about, neither clearing the dirty plates nor wiping the table nor seating us. We were shaded.  There was no breeze. It was over 100 degrees. And there were flies. Lots of little annoying beasties, landing on my bare shoulders and bare legs and hovering over and occasionally alighting on my avocado toast.   Taos Bubbe was hot.  I was dripping sweat.  I had absolutely no appetite; there was enough on my plate that the server offered me a to-go box. We met up a few days later at the Sauce near me....

This is usually my happiest evening of the school year.  The kids show up for their first day tomorrow and, usually, I'm filling the pockets in my Grandma robe with stickers, and deciding which shoes are the most comfortable for standing and bending. I should be setting my alarm for 6:30 so that I arrive in the parking lot while there are still empty spaces.  Hugging and smiling and introducing will occur;  I will comfort little ones who don't want to leave Mommy.....  at least that was my plan earlier this summer, when the virus seemed to have released its death grip on our County, and people were believing that we could go into public spaces without our masks - our reward for being well behaved during Pandemica. Instead, I am going over to Scarlet's to play mahjong.  I can't risk getting sick, and our Governor has made it impossible for the local district to keep me safe.  Masks can no longer be required. This is, I am told, in defense of my liberties. Al...

The last time we flew home from South Bend, we were the only people in the waiting area.  It was early June, we were vaccinated, we were sitting alone and far from the few other travelers who were leaving Indiana at 11pm, so we took down our masks and breathed free.   We weren't worried.  If we believed the science and stayed home for 14 months, we have to believe the science when it tells us we are safe was our mantra.  All that has changed in the past few weeks. Of course, we masked up whenever we went anywhere with FlapJilly and Giblet.  If the least among us could not be protected we would take all the precautions we could - to protect them and to show solidarity with their predicament. As soon as you get your vaccine, my love  was the all too frequent answer to horseback riding and eating inside a restaurant and traveling to Arizona... and it shouldn't be.  If everyone who could get vaccinated did get vaccinated I could have taken the kids to...

Bret-t.. our favorite waiter at our favorite pizzeria, regaled us with stories and videos of his trip to introduce his 7 year old daughter to his fiancee's extended family in Iowa.  Lady Jane and I were treated to videos of fireworks by the lake, of little girls' faces filled with wonder and awe.  We heard stories about jumping off the dock into that lake, of heat and humidity so thick that clothing was drenched within minutes of stepping out doors.   Mostly, though, there were stories of familial connections that were new but which felt old. She doesn't feel like my cousin, Dad.  She feels like my sister ***** SIR created his annual fireworks extravaganza again this year.  Little Cuter sent text invites to their neighbors with kids, and by nightfall there were children running through yards and hiding and chasing and laughing out loud while gasping and ooohing and aahhhing (from a very safe distance) at the sparkles and booms.   Little Cuter took...

This Walgreens was 30 miles and 35 minutes further away than dose number 1.  Unlike last time, there was traffic, lots and lots of traffic.  A rent-a-truck going 60 in the left lane in a 75 mph marked zone backed up cars for miles and miles and miles.  The grey van next to him moved up and back, precluding anyone from passing safely.  We observed all this as we followed the cars that were moving with more alacrity,  awkwardly passing in the far right lane. That's not TBG's usual style of driving, but we were on a mission and he was determined to get me where I needed to be when I needed to be there.  As we drew closer to the orange U-Haul which was causing the disaster, we snarled at the driver who was holding his phone and merrily chatting away.  Our death stares didn't phase him, but they made us feel marginally better. (There ought to be a direct phone line to call the police when someone is holding the phone; it's illegal all the way from here to P...

Things were changing quickly.   Notices went up and were replaced by the time Little Cuter clicked over to check them out.  What I read in the newspaper over breakfast had changed by the time washed the dishes and logged on to look for my eBook.  As Allison asked in a comment yesterday, Where did you hear that? Long after Little Cuter's bedtime, the messages on the provider's website calmed down.  I thought that we were okay, but the wording was somewhat less than reassuring.  I shared the link with her to read when she woke up; and went to (fretful) sleep.   Her texted reply was waiting for my early morning bleary eyes.  Yes,  it seemed like he was okay, but call when they open to be sure.    And that's when anxiety turned to delight.  I was midway through the comics when terminal hold started speaking to me.  I closed the newspaper and turned up the volume to better pay attention to the friendly young man on the oth...

TBG was the first in the family to snag an appointment for the first dose of Moderna.  That was the first deep breath we took since Pandemica arrived; on February 25th at 10:20am he would be on his way to health and safety. Little Cuter and I manage to schedule two doses for me at Walgreens; TBG turned down my offer to schedule one for him there, too.  He had one appointment.  Why test fate by locking in an insurance bid? We were all set.  Our two doses would be finished in time for traveling in April.  The transmissibility results were encouraging.  We were gently treading from cautious optimism to actual hope. Climate change seems to have dashed those hopes.   Anyone who doesn't think that rashes of fires in the west and snowstorms in the south and floods all over the planet aren't a result of our disrespect for our planet needs to take a basic Earth Science course.  I still remember It's all connected  as one of the lessons I learned ...

We drove to Casa Grande, 57 miles and 58 minutes away from home.  It was an overcast afternoon, with more traffic than we'd expected.  We were anxious, for no reason, but there it was. It was 50 miles on the highway and 7 miles on two lane roads past trailers and rusted wrecks and flea markets.  The Walgreens was on what we call a Rte 13 - the McDonalds, Denny's, motel, car wash and other traveler's needs road that bordered Ithaca.    We parked, double masked up, and entered a store together.  It was a moment - we haven't been in a store together since our last grocery outing on March 12th.  There was a short line waiting at the pharmacy; TBG took himself back to the car to stay safe.  I waited as the couple at the window filled out their paperwork (it was possible to do this before you arrived, thus saving everyone time and energy), and then as the lovely pharmacy clerk explained to the next customer, an Hispanic gentleman of indeterminate age wh...

I got an appointment for both doses of the Moderna vaccine; the first one is this Saturday.  We'll be driving  about 45 minutes to Casa Grande, to a random Walgreens just off the highway.   Little Cuter was on it from the early morning, and recruited me to the search via text. The site was clunky and kept crashing and sending error messages and showing three blue dots bouncing at the top of the screen as the site stopped to think. But I managed to get through and answered a few questions and found that there were 9 appointments and 27 appointments and 24 appointments remaining on the first few days that popped up on the screen.   I might have squealed. I figured in the drive time and chose one date and then another, one month later.  I printed out my confirmation code and appointment details on two bright white sheets of paper.  I've been carrying them around all day. There is an end in sight for my total isolation from the world. You'd think...

At the risk of sounding whiny, aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I slept well and exercised and made hot cereal for breakfast and opened the paper to find that, separate and apart from the Arizona Department of Health Services' and the Pima County Health Department's vaccine registration/invitation sites, pharmacies at Fry's and Safeway were getting and injecting vaccine into the arms of people who were reading the Arizona Star. I left the oatmeal cooling in the bowl.  I opened the websites and registered myself and cursed at having to do this all over again for TBG as I clicked through the speedy and easy to follow pages to find that, of course, there were no available dates. I registered TBG before I went to the Safeway site and had the same experience.   I spent the rest of today in a funk.  I logged on randomly during the day, but nothing changed,.  Before I made dinner, I called the local Fry's pharmacy and asked the lovely lady (who ans...

I've been down in the political weeds since Hilary vs The Donald.   I've spent much too much time considering the minutiae of the judicial system.   I've delved into the differences between rural and urban areas in states I've never visited.  And now I know about Reconciliation and Organizing resolutions. It's disgusting.   The back and forth in public.  The space laser.  The Senate Minority Leader commenting on his House counterpart.  The fact that people who were cowering in fear three weeks ago are now denying that anything of consequence really happened. I was happier when I was ignoring the whole thing over the holidays.   Little Cuter keeps reminding me that it's been less than 2 weeks  and that  now there's a plan  but I live in a world where I can access any book I want at any time of day, where Amazon brings me vitamins and cleaning supplies tomorrow, and where there is no vaccine available so I am regis...

They tried.  I have to give them credit for that.   The production values were excellent.  For the most part, the transitions were seamless, with hardly anyone forgetting that they were still muted.  Cornelliana festooned the backdrops and other surroundings of those who trying their best to make us feel as if we were there. Where?  Anywhere.  Last year we were in Las Vegas, just as the reality of Pandemica was beginning to creep in.  Most of us stayed within the confines of the ballrooms of the hotel; hardly anyone ventured out to the art at the Bellagio or to a show anywhere else.  The airport was deserted when the cab dropped me off; there were no fares waiting for him.   Inside the conference there was laughter and conversation.  Ideas were exchanged.  New people spoke to me, and I spoke to them.  There was none of that in the virtual experience. We were lectured to by speakers who could not gauge their audience's...