Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Skipping the 50th Reunion

I had a fabulous time at my 40th high school reunion.  You can read about it here and here and here.

Roomie and others organized a 50th Reunion, opting to hold it on Long Island.  There will be visits to the school, a trip to the beach, a night time soiree, and, I'm sure, much much more.  I won't be there to partake.

I'll be watching Giblet walk and FlapJilly jump off the slide into her kiddie pool.  I'll be harvesting veggies from their over-planted garden and driving to pre-school and dance class.  I'll do laundry and vacuum and cook dinners, all the chores that impinge on my girl's free time.  We'll pick her up from work and bring her home where she'll have nothing to do but play with us.

It will be much more relaxing than a reunion.

I won't have to judge or be judged.  There will be no stressful moments staring at the clothes I've packed, wondering what will be "just right/"  I won't be stared at by people trying to remember my name, and I won't be staring back  wondering the same thing.  I won't have to tell the story of the shooting over and over and over again.  I won't have people commenting on my nearly-but-not-quite-there-yet-semi-fluid gait.

I won't be sharing pictures of the grandbabies.  I won't be looking at anyone else's picture, either. 

I'll miss catching up on who's done what and where they are now.  I will have to rely on the posted photographs to see the changes in a building that was old when I attended, to watch the waves crash on the sand, to count the wrinkles on others' foreheads.  I am okay with that.

There are groups going off together on pre- and post- party adventures.  Would I have been invited to join them?  Who knows?  I spared myself the angst of feeling excluded; some things from high school do not change.

MTF was going then not going then going then giving away the bed she'd saved for me then ..... I'm really not sure what she's doing.

A classmate now living in Phoenix is looking forward to seeing me next weekend in New York. 

A college suite-mate wondered if I planned to see her freshman roommate, my high school classmate, at the event. 

There were lots of strings trying to pull at my heart, but none of them had the tensile strength to draw me in.  I just really didn't want to go.

And, y'know what?  I'm all grown up now.  That's excuse enough.


  1. I never went to a reunion until the 50th and then decided I wanted to see what these people looked like since most I hadn't seen since 18. If I'd gone to my 40th, I'd not have done it as I am really not into the idea of reunions. That year, we went to my husband's also. He had no interest in another but it's kind of neat to see people old who jumped to that instantly in our minds anyway.

  2. It was four years of my life. I can't imagine getting together with people with whom I only have 4 years of experience. I have not kept in touch with any of my high school classmates, and probably wouldn't recognize any of them.

  3. I didn't think I would care about any of them when I left. Some surprised me and I've kept in touch. But for the most part, it's a time I'm glad is past.

    1. I liked the people I went to high school with and really thought we would stay in touch, and perhaps had it been the era of social media, like now, we would have maintained some sort of relationship. But, we didn't, and when I have tried to find any of my old schoolmates, their names don't show up. I'm figuring they just didn't lead a life that put their name on google. Many have died, too. Viet Nam, drugs, age.


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