Tuesday, March 23, 2021

Having a Bad Day

(This post will make a lot more sense if you read yesterday's post and the exchange between Allison and Little Cuter first)

I hadn't made the connection to the Atlanta sheriff's comment until Allison referenced it in a comment.  

Even knowing that it was in large measure self-protective and ultra-protective of FlapJilly all those years ago when Little Cuter used it as a protective shield against the more-than-a-little-scary people sharing the ER Waiting Room for 5 hours on a Saturday night, it's always felt kind.

My girl is nothing if not thoughtful of others.  She takes very good care of herself and her people, but she's always aware of the effect she has on others.  TBG always said she could sell ice in Alaska; they'd buy it just to be around her for a little while longer.  She makes you feel good about yourself.

I love the fact that she recognizes the good in everyone, and that she's raising her children to look for it, too.  Rayshard Brooks was certainly having a bad day when he fell asleep behind the wheel of his car in the drive-thru lane at Wendy's.  That doesn't happen on a good day, not to anyone.  Perhaps, if our police were not as weaponized as they are, if there were active mental health units available to organize a solution,  if they were able to see a person having a bad day rather than a bad guy, an inebriated man wouldn't have been shot dead. 

There's a difference between most of the behavior the police see and really bad behavior.  Plotting to kill someone does not qualify as having a bad day.  Buying a gun and shooting people does not count, either.  

As I was typing this, TBG told me about the shooting in a Colorado grocery store.  That's not a bad day for anyone except the patrons and employees.  

The shooter?  I really don't care how he or she or they are feeling.  Not one bit.  

I'm glad that my grandchildren are able to see the world through kind and thoughtful lenses right now.  FlapJilly knows that there is evil in the world; she's been gradually introduced to the former president over the past year.  She'll come face to face with it soon enough.  Right now, she's delightful and unspoiled and, like her mother, sees and points out the best in others.

It's a gentler way to introduce her to the world, akin to how I describe my perforation to kindergarteners.  A young man who didn't know to use his words to solve a problem, decided to let a gun speak for him.

They can decide if he was a victim of circumstance or a devil in human form on their own.  Little Cuter and I, in our own ways, are trying to teach something worthwhile in the midst of something awful.  Framing it this way puts a spin on the situation that I think Defund the Police really means.  We need to look at things in shades of grey, as long as no one is in danger.

Guns change the equation. If Georgia had a waiting period those people would not have died that day.  If the shooter really was having a bad day, perhaps that time out would have worked like Giblet's time outs ..... a chance to think about your actions and recognize where you went wrong.  I wonder if that deputy sheriff ever thought of that?

And having a bad day doesn't excuse anything.  Just ask Alexander.


  1. I am glad you put yesterday's post in context as I was still reeling from the news from Atlanta when I read it. As I said on my Wordpress blog, that man's self-loathing was turned inside out. That's far more than a bad day.

    1. Yup. Reeling is the right word. There's a bad day and there's a bad act - the one does not have to lead immediately to the other.
      And, for me, it all comes back to guns.

    2. OK, makes perfect sense to frame stuff for little kids as a bad day. It just struck a nerve having heard the sheriff justify a shooting as a result of a bad day. Please consider my comment yesterday as withdrawn.

    3. And we all totally get it. "Struck a nerve" indeed..... once you brought it up I realized the difference and was glad to have the opportunity to think about it more deeply.
      Your comment isn't withdrawn.... it's amplified and explicated and appreciated. Nothing wrong in asking for clarity, which is how I read it <3


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