Tuesday, May 24, 2022

Getting Better

Little Cuter liked the Getting Better label on yesterday's post, and, as usual, she goes right to the point - my work isn't over, it's just taking a more positive trajectory.  

TBG and I laugh about the fact that,  at this stage of life, there aren't a lot of body parts that are getting better.  Maintaining the status quo feels pretty damn good most of the time.  But today the surgeon took out my stitches and sent me on my way - without the walker, without any medication except one big aspirin twice a day, and instructions to swim, but not cannonball off the side of the pool.

This most conservative of physicians thinks I'm getting better.  Who am I to say him nay?

He brought me a titanium ball and socket and the anchoring shaft that went into my femur when I wondered what was put where.  They were (and, I suppose, are) surprisingly heavy; perhaps I can chalk up my weight gain to implanted parts and continue to self-medicate with Baskin Robbins ice cream sundaes.  

My body is getting back to normal.  Leaving the past sent me to a pretty dark place this afternoon.  Sitting in the lobby, waiting to see the surgeon, I relived every memory of CTG that I have of that morning on the sidewalk.  Over the years, I've been fairly successful at separating the limp from the event.  Today, that barrier dissolved.  

It was all one, as it's been all along.  I saw her face and had all the usual worries - did I say enough/the right things/was she scared/and her face/and someone asking who was responsible for this child/and she should be right here right now, being just as glad as the rest of you at how much progress I'm making.

From Tucson through Sandy Hood to Buffalo...... the situation is only getting worse.  Some things are beyond my control, though I can nibble around the edges.  But my physical recovery is totally within my control.  If I do the work, I will be fine.

Holding on to that piece is the next step in Getting Better.  The CTG piece might need a little more help. But that's okay.  Anything else is impossible to imagine.  The sun came up today and I was here to see it.  That makes it a very good day.

Here's to many many many more of them.

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