The Burrow

Facebook has changed the birthday experience.  Far flung friends can type Happy Birthday! and I'm immediately transported to School #1 and the playground, or Ithaca and the Arts Quad, or Chicago's wintry streets.  Seeing the names of friends, old and new, who are sending me love fills my heart with joy. It's also melancholy. This is the first year that I can't call G'ma and thank her for carrying me beneath her heart for nine months.  This is the first time that I can't share the love with someone who was there at the time I came into the world.  I'm looking over the abyss without a safety net. I'm too old for a party on any but a big  number, and 62 is not a big number.  It's best celebrated at lovely lunch with friends, as I did before we left for Chicago and the kids. My mailbox was filled with cards, some funny, some sentimental, all carrying love and warm wishes.  They are arrayed on the kitchen island, on the end table in the living room,...

Grown up children... is that an oxymoron? I'm looking across the family room to the kitchen.  SIR is unpacking the treats he bought for his in-laws on his way home from work.  Chocolate Lovers Chocolate Cake put a huge smile on TBG's face, especially since he hadn't asked for anything.  It speaks to the relationship the boys have that SIR knew exactly what would put a smile on his father-in-law's face. Little Cuter has the cold from hell.  She can't take anything stronger than the occasional Tylenol since Flapjack is growing inside her baby bump.  Congestion, sneezing, and a dry cough left her with a very sore throat.  Channeling Daddooooo, I recommended a salt and warm water gargle.  As she has since childhood, the girl grimaced and refused.  Then, because she is now a grown up and because her throat was on fire and because there were no alternatives, she filled a glass, whisked in the salt, tipped her head back and gargled.  After o...

We made these plans three months ago.  I bought the airline tickets on Southwest, taking advantage of the lowest fares I'd seen since we've been traveling from Arizona to Illinois.  I've promised that visiting our grandchild will be effortless, carefree, easy-peasy. Checking two bags, having no carry-ons, not worrying about overhead space, B12 and B13 on our boarding passes... I did everything I could to remove the stressors from my reluctant traveler's path. I want him to travel with me.  I don't want him to worry. I want him to know that visiting the kids can be stress free.  So, I planned ahead. We discussed the advantages of a car service versus renting our own vehicle. Living in the suburbs, the kids depend on Bessie, their Hyundai.  We couldn't be stranded. Relying on a taxi would quickly tax the budget.  I watched the online offers, crawled through websites of car rental agencies, clicked on the banners scrolling across the screen, responded to t...

Friends have been asking. Family members have phoned.  Apparently, I have been remiss in keeping you all up to date on the progress of my physical self.  Allow me to rectify the situation. I'm doing just fine. Three years ago this week I had one sip of wine to celebrate my birthday.  I'd been teetotalling since the bullets flew; that one sip went straight to my head.  I sported an idiotic grin for the rest of the night, a living and breathing advertisement for the inadvisability of mixing alcohol with narcotics. I was unable to drive myself, nor locomote without a walker or a wheelchair. My exercise regimen consisted of flexing and pointing my toes. On the upside, I didn't cook or clean or do laundry.  My mailbox was full of cards and letters and my inbox held greetings from long lost friends and relatives.  I needed lots and lots of stationary and was forced to shop for that which makes me happiest - pens and paper.  In many ways, life was good....

We've been watching, on and off, for the last two weeks.  TBG catches glimpses during the afternoon, and is able to guide our prime time viewing accordingly.  There are only so many hours I can devote to watching people go downhill, on skis, snowboards, or bobsleds the size of refrigerators.  That was the description the commentator gave as we watched the competitors hulking over their equipment in the waiting shed. It gave me a moment's pause. ***** In the beginning, all I could talk about was Bob Costas's eye infection. When he returned, he apologized for becoming part of the story he was there to report. It was a touching bit of humility from the guy we've all come to associate with the NBC's Olympic Coverage. It was also remarkable - an on-air personality apologizing for hogging the spotlight. There are many reasons to love Bob Costas; this is just one of them. ***** There were some great names. The announcers had a fine time with Yulia and Julia.  I lik...

I rode in the Rodeo Parade today. Want to see why I love Tucson so much?  This is what I saw at 7:30am from my perch inside the wagonette rented by The Happy Ladies' Club  and piloted by the lovely Jane owner and operator of this small business. We were part of four tranches of wagons and horses with marshals in red vests,   keeping order and vaqueros on horseback,  and all kinds of decorations on those wagons  celebrating the organization  which paid the fee to ride. This is not an inexpensive proposition to mount. These four groups merged onto the large, square, parade route,  and we traveled right down the middle of the road. We were not alone. There were fans galore and we waved to every single one of them. Do not underestimate the amount of energy it takes to move your arm back and forth, rhythmically, while smiling and showing enthusiasm. By the end of the 2.5 mil...

I was punished for driving too quickly .  After paying the fee and scanning and submitting my driver's license and the citation, I was given the code to unlock four hours of driving instruction. Four hours. It's better than the eight hours required by the physical class. I could pause at any time; it was nice to know that I wouldn't be penalized for bathroom breaks.  I had not less than four and no more than four and a half hours to complete the reading and viewing and then to take the test.  My computers decided to balk at the task, and, after installing a new mouse and then fleeing to the laptop at the kitchen table, I plunged ahead. I took notes as I went along, not only to remind me of the Arizona facts on which I would be tested, but to share with you what I learned. Actually, it was often quite interesting.  I now know how to test my shock absorbers (push down hard on the front of the car; if it bounces more than twice, the shocks are shot) and my tire ...

She'd have been 91 today.   I'd have brought her a chocolate cake, and chocolate ice cream, and chocolate syrup.  I'd have brought the hats and the blowers we used at the party last year and decorated with balloons and streamers. It's a party I'm so glad that I hosted. Looking at this picture, I am reminded of how fast and how far she failed over the last ten months of her life.  In the moment, at the party, she commented, over and over, that she didn't feel like 90... that 90 was old... that she was old... but that she was here and even if she didn't know where she was or why she was there, it looked like she was having a good time. My friends, the only people who could be invited to the event, still laugh about her confused look followed by What am I doing here? It must be a party. There's cake. And what the hell is on my head? It was moments like that that kept me sane.  That was my mother, wondering why a paper tiara was annoy...

It's bad form to give the conclusion at the start of an essay, but I can't help myself. Hold that title in your brain as you come with me through the warped world of the Miami Dolphin's offensive line's locker room. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the background, Jonathan Martin and Richie Incognito were players on the Miami o-line. Their relationship is a public mixture of crude texts and racial and sexual slurs made aloud and in front of others. Neither player is still with the team; Martin walked out and Incognito was suspended. The team requested an investigation by the NFL; everyone involved is said to have cooperated fully.  No pressure was exerted on the outcome.  All parties knew that the intent was to release the report and its conclusions to the general public. I choose to believe that Ted Wells, an African-American, Harvard educated, lawyer, who has represented both Eliot Spitzer and Scooter Libby, is not an easy man to deceive.  I choose to beli...

I bought myself a new phone today.  I did it all by myself.  I did the research, I considered the options, I made the decisions, and nowhere was there a Cuter offering advice. To call this unusual is to understate the obvious. I start to hyperventilate when I have to consider entering an electronics emporium.  Best Buy makes my palms sweat.  Thinking about talking to the worker bees at the Verizon Store sent my tummy into panic mode.  I have never, ever, ever, entered one of these places without the guiding presence of a child by my side.  Physically holding me upright, or tethered to the other end of my phone, all questions and decisions on laptops and tablets and cell phones and desktops have been considered by the Cuter at my side. Not so today. Today, emboldened by my three previous, lengthy, thought provoking visits to that same Verizon Store, I took the plunge. I brought Anna Quindlen's  Still Life With Bread Crumbs , in hardback, and I settl...

She likes control of the world around her.  I think that's one of the reasons she works from home, editing the writings of others.  She's organized and competent and she pays attention to everything in her sphere.  She researches facts and uses them to comfort herself and others.  She's cognizant of the needs of those around her, and puts herself out to accommodate them, often to her own distress. A person like this shouldn't be facing medical catastrophe. There's no place to hide.  The disease has taken root and must be vanquished. That includes radiation implanted over the offending tumor, shots on a regular basis after the radiation is finished dissolving the mass, genetic testing to determine the likelihood of metastases, on-going, quarterly doctor visits hundreds of miles from home, x-rays and MRI's and pills. Did I mention that the disease has taken root in her eye? Did I mention that the shots go in the eye? Now that you're back with us, aft...

I actually have a dog in this fight. Bob the Reluctant Show Dog, presented by Jean Jennings of Automobile Magazine and JeanKnowsCars  and her husband, Tim, is in the holding area as I type, getting ready to enter Ring 8 for judging at the Westminster Kennel Club's 2014 Dog Show.  I've been following their trip from Michigan, as Jean reports it online, and I have to admit that, having once shared a late night breakfast with Bob, my heart is quite invested in the outcome. Live streaming of the dog show.... I never would have imagined that would be the backdrop to my sunny morning. Yet, here I am, reading my email, filling out alumni contact forms for my alma mater, checking my Facebook feed, and listening to the hoots and hollers as the setters, Irish Red and White, leave the ring and the Wirehair Pointing Griffons take their places. Bob's group, the Chesapeake Bay Retrievers, is due up next.  My anxiety is mounting. There's no commentary, just the occasional bark i...

I do believe that Power Point has ruined the teaching experience.  I speak from experience, vast experience, sitting in a classroom, watching the teacher read from the board.... leaving me bored in my chair. I don't understand it.  Long, newsy, two and three sentence points, strung together in a wall of text alleviated only by the italicized titles, adorned the screen in the Rubel Auditorium this morning, just as they had the two weeks before.  I read them, digested them, then settled back in my chair so that the instructor could read them aloud. It would be too much to assume, I imagine, that the room full of adult learners were actually capable of reading them to themselves.  The teacher felt the need to read them to us.  His voice is loud and clear and full of energy.  He reads well.... I have lots and lots of examples to back up my claim. He's read paragraphs from the novel we're studying, long, dense, already read by the audience, chapters we had...

Brenda Starr and I went to Reid Park today. I'm sorry if you are stuck in your homes, fed up to your eyeballs with Snow Days. We stripped off our sweatshirts half-way through our stroll.  A prophylactic pee, as Brother instructed my nieces, is a necessary and wise step to take before embarking on any kind of physical activity. This sign on the bathroom door led to much snarkiness, although the event itself was unremarkable. Then, it was off to meander around the duck pond,  marveling at all we did not know about our amphibious friends. This fellow has a lovely brown head and longer than average feet.  Ruler of the roost, this fellow   was followed by three beautiful ladies in white We never did figure out why this one wing was stuck up in the air,  or why this one has such odd feet. Brenda Starr carried stale hot dog buns which we provided, gratis, to the beasts. It was only after we had tossed the empty ba...