Monday, April 4, 2011

This Last Week

I've been reading a lot about myself this week, this last week of sitting and reflecting, this last week when appliances will define my abilities, this very odd week.
I'm much faster and defter in maneuvering my wheelchair.  I laughed as AnnaFarkle shook her head, marveling at my quick turns.  GrandFarkle#3 and I exchanged sly grins as I gaily replied "It's really kind of fun!" ... because it is what it is so I smile and move on.

I like this new me, this able to smile instead of growl me.
I guess it wasn't enough to have one pseudonym.  Now I need a name for who I was before January 8th.  Suzi is who you all know since TBG told the media that was my name.  I'm glad he did; Susan is much too formal. After all, we've been sharing stories about infirmities and blood loss and death and healing.  I think you qualify as friends after all this time.

But who was I before this?
In amongst the search results I came across a blogger who took issue with a conversation I had with Christina-Taylor's older brother about 2 weeks after I was shot.  Texas was excited to hear that our 27 year old son would be visiting Tucson that weekend.  He was looking forward to a replay of last summer's fun-filled afternoon spent with Big Cuter and Christina-Taylor and every Super Soaker known to mankind.  The three kids spent 2 hours sending streams of water at one another as they raced over around under and through our pool.  It was joy uncontained.  If you are only as happy as your unhappiest child, that afternoon we four (dry) parents were ecstatic.  Completely filled with smiles. 

Big Cuter assumed the role of "large older friend" that afternoon.  He'd been C-T and Texas just a blink of an eye ago and yet there he was, being pelted by adoring little friends.... and loving it.... just as his big cousin had done at Muir Beach two decades ago.

The blogger in question took issue with my reference to water gun fights so soon after a gun had wreaked such havoc on us.   I can see his point, but he's missing mine.  Perhaps, without context, his oops is warranted.  But there is nothing but love and wonder in my heart when I remember that afternoon.  Two against three, the Crayola Kids against the world (aka my son), strategies and plans having been laid days in advance --- they weren't trying to hurt one another..... they were having fun.

Sometimes I think we let our rhetoric get us in more trouble than it's worth.  He's right... but he's oh so very very wrong.
I am having a hard time convincing myself that my hip actually knows whether I stand on it now or in 16 hours.  But I hear you all screaming Don't be an idiot so I wait, patiently, kinda sorta calmly, for tomorrow at 11am.  That will be today, as you read this.  Come back, same time, same space, same station on Tuesday to hear the results.

There may even be pictures.


  1. On that blogger's "ooops" comment, I submit that absolutely nobody gets to figure out what works for you these days but you. He says he'd been trying to figure out what life is like for you and then proceeds to judge what SHOULD be right for you. Doesn't work.

    You looked fabulous on CNN. Will be kinda sorta calmly awaiting the results of your weight-bearing moment.

  2. I think people need to lighten up. FGS, it was play-time in the pool. It's not like Little Cuter and the Crayola kids were playing with real guns or even toy guns. Those water toys are just that; water toys.

    I hate guns and I will not allow anything that resembles one in my house, but I don't see anything wrong with water toys.

    Looking forward to Tuesday's post! Woo hoo!

    Lots of hugs,


  3. Yes, you girls get it exactly! I, too, hated guns when the kids were little. Refused to have realistic ones in the house. But water pistols, FGS (Thanks for that, Megan). Lighten up indeed!

  4. Did you get a copy of the Arizona Republic article about you and BC? It's fun to have a face for the name! If you need a copy of the article, please let me know and I will have my friend Pam Simon get it to you somehow.

  5. I have a copy, Katiekono, but thanks for the offer. I do love my blogospherical friends looking out for me :)

  6. Tell that guy to mind his own $%*&! business. Sheesh! And--don't be an idiot!!! It's almost time, so wait a teeny bit longer. Holding my breath with you... xoxoxo

  7. I agree with you, as usual, and he should keep his opinions to himself. I don't allow real guns in my home, but water guns and children? Give me a break.

  8. Small people with small views of the world tend to have very big opinions on very big subjects. Amusing that he would think to challenge my mom's judgment. Foolish, foolish....

  9. I agree with you, I think he was reading too much into the situation. I loved the comment you left for him. Very classy, not that I would expect anything different from you :)

  10. My cousin recommended this blog and she was totally right keep up the fantastic work!

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