OK, those of you who know me can stop laughing now.
Really. I mean it. Stop laughing.
See.... I'm even doing it now. Because this is who I am. I boss people around.
Someone must have reinforced it when I was young. Imelda was admiring my baby picture... at least I thought she was admiring it until I listened more closely and found that she was laughing at my sense of annoyance, of being interrupted while performing very important chewing. Uh, people.... I'm busy here!
She marveled that my parents chose this particular shot, one with so much attitude, instead of a more traditional portrait. She thinks it says a lot about them. I'd never considered that before. I do know that I still have that handset.
But I digress.
When we played house in elementary school, I was always the dad. Imagine us, 6 and 7 and 8 years old, outlining the walls of our family's home with the fallen leaves on the asphalt playground... on the girls' side. Only the kindergarten kids had co-ed recess; 1958 was such a different world.
While the boys played ball games we created leafy domesticity. Aunts, cousins, sisters, babies, grandmothers, mothers and one dad - me. I used to think that they were being mean, not letting me be female, separating me from themselves because I was younger and had skipped a grade and joined their class 8 days into 1st grade.
In retrospect, from Imelda's perspective, perhaps it was just obvious to them that I was the dad. I'd been bossing people around my whole life, and so did the Dad in their life.
If teenagers are idiots, maybe it's just because they have had more time to refine the inanity of elementary school. It certainly seems true in my case.
I'm a terrible board member - just ask anyone who has ever served on one with me. I'm too bossy. I'm a good parliamentarian, a good presiding officer, but otherwise you really don't want to have me sitting next to you around the table. Policies and procedures are your friends is my board mantra; if I can't be in charge then just follow the rules, please.
TBG tells me that I was bossing the nurses and techs and doctors from the moment I was fully conscious. Truth be told, he tells people that he knew his wife was back from the brink when he heard me giving orders.
Now, I didn't think they were orders. I just wanted to be sure that what needed to be done was done, and done right the first time so that there didn't have to be a second time. I was just asking for what I needed, and, as Imelda and I agreed this afternoon, the world would run a lot more smoothly if everyone was honest about what they needed.
And if that isn't the most positive take on bossiness you've ever read then I want to know what is.
(There I go again......)