Thursday, May 22, 2014

Is it Weird?

I sent her furniture for the baby's room as her birthday gift.

I think I forgot to get TBG to sign the card I remembered to mail.

This morning, her email to me wondered what it meant that she kept forgetting that her birthday was approaching.  Is it weird? 

Yes, sweetie, it's very weird.  It's not unusual, but it's weird.

She's getting to the point where the individual years blur together. I remember it well.  She went to a 1980's theme party; I was bemused. I missed the 1980's; being pregnant and parenting little ones was as far as I could see. My musical tastes ran to Raffi and lullabies, my reading material centered on Margaret Wise Brown, and forget about fashion or lifestyle trends. Were I to be invited to that theme party, I'd have worn sweatpants.

My birthdays came and went and I was happy to buy my own strawberry shortcake and take a long bubble bath and be done with it all.  I had decade-celebratory parties for TBG, but I wasn't that interested in creating hoopla over my own. My girl's planning a similar weekend for herself - a pre-natal massage and a sunny weekend in her garden.  No fuss. No muss. Just peace.


Daddooooo always wanted Peace and Quiet for his birthday.

I sent clothes.

He wore brand new polo shirts while building and painting birdhouses.

The stains drove G'ma nutty, but they always made me smile. He had me around while he was doing the work, like a giant hug that he could wash and put on again and again.

I can see it and feel it right now.

That's what's weird about it, Little Cuter.  You're changing from celebrating outside yourself to celebrating within.  You're looking at your life from a different perspective, with someone new anchored firmly at the center... literally and figuratively.

You're rotating around a new axis, and the old pieces have to find their way.  They announce themselves with varying degrees of surprise... like, really, kiddo, HOW could you forget your birthday?????... or a yawn.... or ..... furniture for your birthday present.

Or, maybe, it's just that you have a lot on your plate right now?

Or, maybe, it's pregnancy-brain?

Or, maybe, it's just plain weird.

Whatever it is, there's one thing for certain: It's YOUR day.  That much hasn't changed. It's the day that you came out to join the party... a party you've been enlivening ever since.

Happy Birthday, Little Cuter!

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