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Wednesday, May 8, 2024

41 Years

When it dawned on her that she'd forgotten my birthday, G'ma could only laugh and say that the idea of her child being 40 years old was something she was not surprised she'd forget.  She was retired and the date was only important when she was writing a check.  

She was properly abashed; how do you forget a kid's birthday?  We agreed that it was funny and moved on.  

It's always been a favorite memory, my mother surprised by the passage of time, by the fact that I was so old.  Today, though, it's occurring to me that she couldn't imagine it for herself.  How was it possible that four decades had passed since that late night and early morning in French Hospital in NYC?  How could she possibly be old enough to have a 40 year old child?

I'm wondering that myself right now.  At 12:16pm, on a sunny Mother's Day Sunday 41 years ago today, Big Cuter arrived and looked around.  I can feel the feels and remember the people and put myself back there without any trouble at all. It can't possibly have happened that long ago.

I haven't forgotten it this year.   I baked him the brownies he asked for.  I shopped for what he wanted, found a card in G'ma's stash, and didn't bother with anything more than one sheet of tissue paper as wrapping.  After 41 years, I've learned that he doesn't care about the frou-frou.

I sent it to arrive in time, although he wouldn't have cared if it were late.  Again, just knowing he's loved is enough.

Can we have known each other for 41 years?  That doesn't feel impossible at all.  I cherish every day of it.  

But the fact that over those 41 years I have become a 72 year old woman is obviously something to consider....... from a distance...... 

Where's G'ma when I need her? 

*****

Happy Birthday, Big Cuter!  

I love you every bit as much as when you first arrived - and that's A LOT.

<3,  your maternal unit.

2 comments:

  1. Happy BIRTH day to you. And happy 41 years to Big Cuter. The years do pass quickly, don't they. Our girl will be 46 later this year, and our granddaughter will be 15 next Monday. This passage of time is just so startling.

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    Replies
    1. Startling is the word, indeed. Just like the hs junior I met as a 2nd grader in the garden who visited and amazed me - she's the same and yet so different.... where did the time go.
      a/b

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