Little things have been getting to me lately. For example:
Why is it cloudy today? I was supposed to walk in the pool for ambulation exercise before PT at 5 this afternoon. But, instead of warm, balmy, sultry weather, the afternoon was filled with lowering clouds that couldn't even manage to drop a drizzle of rain on my yard. Cool, cloudy and dry, with just enough wind to be more than annoying - the weather was ruining my plans without even as much as a trickle of moisture to enhance the landscape and make up for my pissiness.
I know, I know. I could be living on the banks of the overflowing Mississippi, but then again no I couldn't because I picked a spot with as few natural disasters as I could imagine. No earthquakes. No hurricanes. Above the flood plain. I still managed to get myself shot here, but no one can blame the weather for that.
As the title indicates, denizens, this post is drivel.
What else is absurdly ticking me off?
How about the woman in the gigantic SUV who parked right next to The Schnozz today. She was fully enclosed in her spot, as I was in mine. My door could open far enough to allow me to swing my leg inside. But I couldn't see on-coming cars over the hugeness that was my new neighbor, and there were three other spots available, none of them right next to me, and she sure looked fit enough to walk from any of them to the nail salon and she was the only person in the vehicle. Did she really need to take a tank to get a manicure?
I was peeved.
There were odd footprints in the courtyard's newly laid gravel mulch this morning. I would guess they belong to javelina, but the gate was closed and the peccary don't jump. It's not bobcat nor coyote nor bird. I'm flummoxed.
Great. I'm being invaded by beings from outerspace. Beings that don't even care to mask their tracks.
Am I losing my mind? I am furious at nonsense and worried about weirdness. I'm angry over nothing and everything (OKC shouldn't have won that game on Monday night; they had three chances and that is two too many if you ask me) and the attitude doesn't seem to be getting me anywhere. Yet it manages to stick around, poking at me and filling my mind with drivel.
I have to consider it drivel. I refuse to accept that this will be the state of my nerves for the rest of my life. I must envision a future which allows me to smile at futility and wave off annoyances.
This being pissed off at everything is not where I want to be. Not right now. Not ever.
Don't take this as a sign that you will stay this way. We all have periods where everything annoys us. And we are usually right! I also hate those SUV people who park next to me even if there are lots of spaces available elsehere. Of course, part of my anger is that I don't think anyone should drive those things, ever. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteI hate days/weeks/months like that... sometimes the only thing that will snap a bad streak is a break from the routine. Finding something you don't do very often, going off the beaten path, like driving up Mt Lemmon... just because. Positivity will find you again.
ReplyDeleteLaura is right; it will pass.
ReplyDeleteI KNEW that Laura would be first here, righting my ship and reassuring me as she totally agrees with me. Is it any wonder I love The Cheeses so much?!
ReplyDeleteA break in routine - a drive up Mt. Lemmon thank you very much Kelli MW - sounds like a great idea. I'm chemo-sitting JannyLou today, but tomorrow I am grabbing G'ma and heading for the hills. After all, if Laura has convinced kenju then this must be sound advice!
a/b
Hummmmmmm....right up above this box are the words "So.... what did you think? I'm interested..." Well, I think your depressed: From not being able to do every day things well, and not being able to go and do as you please. you've got your day chopped up with doctor appointmenst, therapy...etc. None of which are your normal routine. Yet, you HAVE to go. You can't do or go as you please. YOU ARE LIMITED.
ReplyDeleteI am feeling the same right now. I had some sort of a brain fark happen a month ago on the 9th. I was in the kitchen with out of town guests talking and out of the blue, my brain hurt and I said to my husband, "There is something wrong in my brain." Said that twice. That's all I remember. I've had an MRI, MRA, EEG, STRESS TEST, ECHOgram. The MRA showed some artery was enlarged that leads to the department in the brain that controls dizziness and seizures...I have an appointment to see a Neurologist next Tuesday. I've been waiting for over a month. Why am I telling you all this??? Well, because I haven't been able to drive. They won't let me drive until I see the Neurologist. I have been trapped in this house and I feel the same pissiness you have been feeling....and yes, I feel depressed. I am cranky. I want to eat. I want to drive. Not be dependant on others to take me to the drug store. the grocery store. the post office. the card shoppe, the feed store. I want to do it myself. Your post sounded just like me. We are in the same boat. Your boat is more loaded than mine. But a boat none the less. Here is to sunny days for you, and my car back for to me! clink!...debbie
God, welcome to my world! I'm always annoyed. I try to shrug it off, but I'm sorry, I shouldn't have to do dishes on Mother's Day! Especially after hubby and the kids made me breakfast and he let them sit all day. Then I was totally pissed off that the only way they would get out of the sink into the dishwasher is if I did them myself.
ReplyDeleteAnd then hubby gets hit in our Shnozz on Tuesday (everyone's fine), my nine year-old has strep-throat. Boss is giving me crap about working from home.
Misery loves company.
I think it's OK to indulge in drivel once in a while. Allow yourself to feel annoyed. It's OK as long as it doesn't turn into forever. ;)
Sending hugs!
Megan xxx
And keep in mind that Aged Parm is a good partner for outings to get a change of scenery. The Big Cheese flew back to Indiana on Monday, so she needs adult supervision. xoxo
ReplyDeleteI purely hate those times when I have them. Nothing suits, nothing's right, everything sucks and ME, most of all. I can't explain why they come nor predict when they'll leave, but they do leave. They're like the "chronic" pain in my piriformis that cripples me one day and recedes into insignificance, the next. Is it barometric pressure? Did I sit too long, stand too long, walk too long, work out too long or not enough? There's no rhyme, no reason.
ReplyDeleteSo, on those pissy days (those piriformis days, too), I just have to accept that I have to baby me a little. That once seemed impossible! But that's how it sometimes is now. And, turns out, it's not as bad as I thought. After all, I've always recommended it to others at times like these; am I less human than they?
I am feeling the same way lately, but I don't have any reason for it. You do. Cut yourself some slack!
ReplyDelete